Sunday, September 09, 2007

My Conditon

As most of you have probably noticed on more than one occassion, I have been a not-so dedicated blogger over the past little while. I was looking back at my archives and since the beginning of this summer I have only posted 14 times. Having my blog as my way to journal my daily activities, my girls' achievements and sometimes struggles, my thoughts on issues, and my family's happenings and doings, these few random posts have made me sad. Not sad because of the things that I have shared about these days, but the things that we have done as a family, my thoughts and struggles I have experienced over the past couple of months, our family's vacation, and even the few date nights and girls' lunches that have gone undocumented.
I have struggled with blogging since day one. I rack my brain for hours upon hours trying to come up with interesting titles and topics and when I finally come up with them, the creative writing I lack, haunts me as I sit at the computer for hours typing and then backspacing over and over again. I always wanted my blog to be our family's history and never thought about impressing other bloggers but I have found it difficult to blog about my daily thoughts and happenings when so many others have such interesting, creative posts I wish I could conjour up in my mind.

Not only has my lack of creativeness steered me away from blogging but I must confess that I have a condition that has also gotten in the way of me blogging the past four months. I have been keeping my condition a secret to most everyone, including my parents and family. I have always been the type to not tell much about myself to those around me including family. No matter how big or small "things" may be, I tend to want to just hold them close to me. It is also hard to find time to blog when Greg is home. The past month, since starting his practice he has been home every night. I feel guilty to plop myself in front of the computer for any length of time. Having him around now is such a blessing. Having him gone so much over the past six years and now him being here, I can honestly say there is nothing better.


Since my birthday, back in May I have held my condition close to me, only telling Greg. We were a bit taken back by this news and even brought many tears along with it, from me more so than Greg. It was hard to comprehend at first and then once the shock and fear subsided we were more than excited. My condition has caused me great tiredness, many days of feeling under the weather, less and less energy, shorter running distances, more frequent bathroom visits, etc. This condition left me frightened on a few occassions when I had to quickly find places for my girls to go so I could drive myself to the ER. Then and only then did I reveal this condition to Jenny, so she could care for my kids.

I know most of you are on the edge of your seat and maybe even reading ahead, to find out just what may be wrong with me. I am happy to announce my condition is a happy condition. It is that not only is baby #4 on it's way, BUT baby GIRL #4 is on her way, AND I'm half way to my due date. YEP, that's right I am twenty weeks along and she will be joining our family in January. I know this may catch some of you by surprise. It may sound strange that I kept this a secret not only from all of you but also our family. I always like to spread news like this in a creative way, and thought I would wait until we were on our Disney Cruise with my entire family and then I would spill the beans. Well, I hadn't gotten up the nerve,yes the nerve, to tell my girls before we left on vacation. My oldest daughter had a hard time dealing with the news she would be getting a third baby three years ago. I was even more scared that this time she would not only cry but maybe want to divorce me as her mother. I'm not sure why she or I had feelings like this but they were there. So when my girls didn't know about another baby joining our family, and the fear of them reacting in an UNexciting way, I thought if I could hide it while we were on the cruise then I would just wait awhile longer. I was 14 weeks along, not really having morning sickness any longer, but I was beginning to show signs of carrying something extra around. I have always been on the smaller side when I am first pregnant, thanks to a uterus that is tilted back and a deeper pelvis. My boobs on the other hand are not so easy to disguise. They are the first sign, even before a postive pregnancy test that I am expecting. By the end of the first trimester they have grown at least one cup size, so shirts that hide my news are few and far between. I could find shirts that fit better up top, but then I would look suspicious because I usually don't wear shirts that are baggy. I'm sure that would have been an obvious give away. My sister in law even almost spoiled my surprise while we were on the cruise. She asked if my swimsuit had extra padding in it, and of course I lied and said yes and opted not to wear that suit the rest of the trip. Every time I ate I had to go on and on about how I was eating too much and exercising to little because I was getting a pooch. At that point of my pregnancy my stomach would look pretty normal and then the moment I ate(even the smallest of meal) I would get a pooch. I have had many backaches for the past three months trying to suck my tummy in so no one would suspect anything. I would find myself so tense and trying so hard to hide my condition that I would come home and fall on the bed in compete relaxation.




Our baby at 12 weeks



We succeeded in keeping our secret while we were on the cruise. I was then fifteen weeks along. My family was five hours away, I thought surely I could hold out another month and find out what I was having, and then have a bigger and better surprise to reveal. My sister and my parents decided to come visit us the weekend when I was seventeen weeks along. I was stressed again that my secret would be found out, in a noncreative way. I prepared myself for 48 hours of eating small amounts and standing with great posture, sucking in my tummy, and wearing black shirts to camaflouge my growing chest. My family came and went and didn't notice a thing. I had pulled it off once again, but started getting nervous that everyone wouldn't be as excited as I thought, about our surprise. I almost dreaded telling everyone.


I was scheduled for my ultrasound when I was eighteen weeks and a few days along, but a few days before, I began having Braxton Hicks contractions. I would have a normal stomach and then in a matter of seconds I would look like I was six months along. I couldn't eat a normal meal without pain, I had to unbutton my pants, and lay the passenger seat back while riding in the car to lessen my pain. I didn't sleep for a few nights and Greg convinced me to go into the hospital to get checked. I spent the entire day on a Saturday in the OB triage having ultrasounds, ct scans, IVs, a cathetar, and telling my problems to med students, residents, nurses, and attending physicians. Finally, after eight hours I was sent home with a diagnosis of renal cholic. Not exactly sure what that entails, but I understood it as being dehydrated to the point that my kidneys were developing kidney stones and this was causing my contractions. I was ordered to stop working out so much, and if I did, to do things that didn't cause me to sweat to the point where I get dehydrated. I have almost drank myself sick of water, and found myself craving diet cokes often. I have had will power to limit my diet coke intake to about one a day and replaced it with lots and lots of water.
Rewind to half way through my hospital stay, I sent Greg home to be with the girls. We decided it would be a great time to tell them they would be sisters again and maybe I would get a little bit of sympathy. He told them the news and surprisingly they were excited. He then took them to Chuck E Cheese to celebrate the beginning of school and the new baby. After they ate and played to their hearts content, they stopped and boguht me flowers and then picked me up at the hospital. They were all smiles in the car and were obviously excited to see me and talk about the new baby.

We decided to make the girls more excited about me being pregnant, by taking them to the ultrasound. Greg met us there and of course we waited for a while. Finally, we were told we were not expecting the boy Greg always dreamed of but adding more pink to our family. I have always loved girls and was nervous at the possibility of having to learn about boys. It would have been fun to experience a boy, to finally use our family name we picked out ten years ago when I was pregnant the first time, and for the Gordon name to go on(Greg was the only son of an only Gordon son).

We told our girls they couldn't tell anyone until we were ready to start spreading the news. The two older ones understood this but found it difficult to not tell their friends. I was a bit concerned about our youngest understanding the "do not tell" that everytime she talked to my mom or anyone in our family I coached her on what to say. I had to tell little fibs, like Grammy's working, several times so she wouldn't call a family member. We finally came up with our creative reveal and sent a baby girl flower arrangement to my mom and Greg's mom. I came up with the idea, since our baby will be the eighth grandchild on both sides, for them to place eight roses in the arrangement along with other flowers. I also had the florist write this cheesy poem on the card:


We hope our news will
make you shout GREAT!
In a few short months you will
be Grammy/Nana to #8!!

Love, MAG(our girls' initials)


Well everything was good until the initials were turned into NAG. My mom was starting an IV when someone called her to the nurses station to see her flowers. She couldn't figure out why she would be getting flowers and immediately started reading into everything in and around the flowers. She called me and I was out of the car getting my girls' from school. She then called my sister and she obviously had no idea what my mom was talking about, so my mom knew they my sister wasn't the one expecting. Then she called my sister in law who was not available to answer the phone. She was stressed out to say the least. She then decided to call Greg, who also couldn't answer his phone. Finally Greg called her back and she was excited and nervous at the same time. Meanwhile Greg's mom received her flowers and did the call around, just like my Mom did. No one knew what was going on and finally when Greg talked to her and told her it was true, our fourth girl was well on her way to our family, she was beyond excited.

Today -20 weeks &2 days

So here I am twenty weeks along in my pregnancy announcing this to all of blogger land. I'm sure my phone will start ringing from friends that haven't heard our exciting news. We feel so blessed to add another sweet spirit to our family. Our girls all have a unique look, one not looking alot like another. I can't wait to see who she resembles and shower her with hugs, kisses, and much love. We look forward to meeting her in just twenty more weeks.








56 comments:

Jenny said...

I am so glad you finally are telling. I was dying holding it in for that long. You know we are SO excited for you and to meet another little gordon girl!

And for the record my stomach is STILL larger than yours (sigh)

carlo said...

Oh my goodness! What great news for you and your family. WOW!

I have been on a break and now I can add your good news to the wonderful things I have come back to. YAY ANGIE and the fab 4 girlies~!

Price Cream Parlor said...

What fantastic news! I am sure that Kelly (who has 4 girls) will tell you how wonderful it is! How exciting! 20 weeks! WOW! That is a long time to keep it a secret! Funny about the NAG! Hope things go smoothly for you! Take it easy and congratulations!!

mommyoffour said...

Hello! I found your blog a while back and had to drop in and say hello!

First of all, I love reading your blog. I have been anti-blogging lately for the same reasons. I am not nearly as creative as everyone else!!

Second of all, I have FOUR girls too and love it!!! I am so happy for you, such exciting news!

One more thing, tell Jenny I miss her blog! :)

Again, congratulations!!

becca said...

OH MY GOSH!!!...OH MY GOSH!! I wondered what had caused you to stop blogging, but never would have suspected this!! ARE YOU KIDDING? This is how big you are at 20 weeks?! Did you see my picture at 20 weeks??? How is this even possible? If I stayed as small as you I don't think I would hate pregnancy so much, I am already so TIRED of looking and feeling like a huge overstuffed marshmallow!!

Anyway, CONGRATULATIONS!!! It is wonderful news and I am so happy for you! I hope you are feeling good and can't wait to hear the name!

Lucy said...

Oh....so much congratulations to you and Greg! What a lucky little girl to have so many great females to grow up with. I can't believe you could keep it a secret for so long! I have always wanted to wait for that long to tell people, mainly so that the pregnancy would go faster, but once the throwing up and days in bed start at six weeks, I'm usually outed.

Take care of yourself! And thanks for sharing. Seriously...if I was superstitious....this seems to be the season of pregnant bloggers. Is it traveling through the broadband cables???

Angie said...

Becca- I knew my picture would cause people to freak, but I don't have very many pictures of me the last few months. I have wanted to take pictures similar to this one every four weeks, like my other pregnancies, but haven't taken any. Don't worry, about feeling bigger than me now. I actually took that picture yesterday and after a full Sunday of eating junk and eating today, my tummy looks alot different today. I usually don't show until about this point and then it seems like I grow faster than normal because of it. For some reason I am getting back fat this time and that makes me feel yucky.

I'm feeling good, but wonder how in the world I can care for 4 girls. Our Sunday morning hair wars are tough enough with three!!

I'm due the 26th of January. When are you due?

Koenig Family Blog said...

I am a lurker and just wanted to say CONGRATS! I love reading your blog!

Jessica said...

wow! congratulations! i cannot believe you were able to hold in the news for 20 weeks!! we've never lasted longer than a few hours of taking the pregnancy test. girls are so much fun -- i have 4 sisters and they are my best friends in the world. congrats again. :)

Kristin said...

CONGRATULATIONS!! That is so exciting!! 4 cute little girls!! I am so happy for you and your darling family. Take care of yourself and BEST WISHES!!

You are AMAZING to keep your secret that long. I always want to but the minute we get a positive pregnancy test the calling begins. You are my hero.

Kelly said...

Angie!! Congratulations! I'm so excited for you! As a mom of 4 girls, there really is nothing better. And my oldest has such a cute bond with my youngest -- different than her other little sisters. I'm sure in a year you will look back and wonder how you ever did without little baby girl #4. They tend to be the icing on the cake, I think.

Tina said...

I just wanted to say hi and tell you congratulations. I am also pregnant and am 23 weeks along..due the 6th of January. We are also having a girl and I am so excited! Congratulations again and you look great.

andrea said...

Congratulations Angie. That is such great news. How fun to have four little girls. I'm so glad that your girls were excited. Glad you are back to blogging. I've missed your posts.

Angela said...

What WONDERFUL news!!!! Another girl, that is PERFECT! Having a newborn around the house has been bliss for me--makes me second guess our decision to stop at three. Let us know how four is!

Hope that house you are building in BIG! :)

Mindy said...

what a surprise! I wish I could hold the news in as long as you. You're a great secret keeper! I have to say that you do not look pregnant in your picture- I'm 16 weeks and my stomach popped out all of a sudden- I could put your tummy to shame! congrats!

Kristen said...

Angie, I'm so happy for you! I am one of 5 girls, it's the BEST!!! (we do have a brother who's the best too) but oh how I love my sisters!! I can't believe you were able to keep it a secret this long! Your amazing! I'm glad your feeling better and all I can say is I WISH i looked like you:)!
Congratulations!!!

donna said...

I am so happy for your girl. What a great news :) Wow you are going to have 4 girls. A lot of pink and barbie dolls at your house.

Take care of yourself, get some rest and keep us up dated.
Oh to answer your questions.
I am running a half marathon in OCT!!!!

Kelly A. said...

Great new! Congratulations! You guys have had a big summer with a lot of changes, this is the happiest by far!

Janet said...

I can't believe you are already 20 weeks along-you are amazing at keeping secrets-I sure couldn't do that! Congratulations! You are a beautiful pregnant lady-do you have a pound of fat on your body?

What are you naming this little girl?

Holly said...

Oh my goodness, where is your belly!!!!??? I wish I looked as you and I'm NOT preggo!

Congratulations! I love the whole NAG/MAG thing - we do the same thing with our initials - or we did - we are MITCH but then Lucas came along - oh well.

So very exciting for you - I know what you mean about the 4th sibling - my kids so want another sister - but the chance of having 4 boys and one girl is birth control enough! So lucky to have 4 girls - happy day! Thanks for sharing!

Elizabeth said...

Congratulations Angie. That is all very exciting. You must be a wonderful mother to little girls!

michelle said...

Congratulations Angie! How exciting to be having baby gilr # 4!

Amy said...

It is amazing how fantastic you look at 20 weeks. I would love to keep pregnancy under the wraps, but it becomes rather obvious rather quickly for me. Congrats!

becca said...

Angie,

I think I am due Jan. 6th (first date was Jan 3rd...then they put it to the 20th at my first ultrasound, which made my date of conception AFTER I already had a positive preg. test...so we knew that was wrong...now they are saying around the 6th, putting me only about 3 weeks ahead of you!)

You look great, I am just jealous! I have gained SO MUCH already, so I know that most of my "showing" is ME, not baby!! I am so happy for you and can't believe how many people are pregnant right now!!

Lauralee said...

I am about 4 years post baby and my stomach is way bigger! you are tiny! that is amazing that you could hide it soooooo well especially in a swimsuit! I normally look pg in anything I wear, especially a swim suit! anyway.. congrats that is sooo exciting!!

melanie said...

Congrats Angie! We are on boy # 3 and it's not hair we deal with but noise. Hope I can handle it! Yeah for January babies (I'm due on the 6th, same day as Becca).

Natasha said...

WOW, congrats! I cannot believe you kept it such a secret - I could never do that!! Glad you are back to blogging too. I know this must have been a nervewracking summer for you and it must be sort of a relief to be able to share the excitement now.

Stephanie said...

Congratulations!!!! I am so happy for you. I wondered what had happened to you. Now, I understand. :D Another girl, wow! That is so fun and by the way....you are so tiny for 20 weeks. I hope all goes well for you!!

My mom had 4 girls and then 2 boys. I can't imagine life without my sisters and brothers. Sisters share a special bond for sure.

Anna said...

Awesome! Congratulations!

Neighbor Jane Payne said...

Congratulations Angie! I'm so glad you shared pictures and details because after Jenny pulling that April Fool's joke about her being pregnant (and me completely falling it for it) I wouldn't have believed you!

This is great news.

Kari said...

Congratulations Angie and Family!! I have been MISSING you around blog land and I'm so glad it's for such a HAPPY reason!!!

Although I have to say, I thought you were going to say that you THOUGHT it was a girl and then learned it was a BOY!!!

Anyway, thanks for the intriguing read! And I hope everything in your pregnancy goes smoothly!!!

Andie said...

Such wonderful news! I am so thrilled for you.

Christina said...

im kristen's friend..and she told me about your "announcement!" so fun!

i too dont tell ANYONE i am pregnant till im 20 weeks along too-because i too havea tipped uterus and deep pelvis i can pull it off!! WHOO HOO! and my boobs are ALREADY weapons of mass destruction-so they are just big prego or not!!

i too have 4 girls (we opt'd to never find out the sex SO FUN!)

for the last pregnancy (she's 3 now) i made a 5x7 scrapbook of my girls together -then the last page was an ultrasound photo-the look on all our parents faces- PRICELESS! and THEN to tell them i was 20 weeks-it just cant be beat!

congrats-and its fun to see someone else who can hold onto a secret for 20 weeks!!

tori said...

hey congrats!! we are all so happy for you and Greg. I love all my nieces to death and can't wait for another one!! i'm sure she'll be as beautiful as the rest. I love ya'll so much!!

smithfam said...

Oh man, all of you cute pregnant girls are making me want another one!! Stop it already! LOL
I am freinds with some of your blogging buddies. I couldnt help but comment on your cute announcement. I am not sure I could keep that one a secret for so long. I usually dont show until my 6th or so month. Being almost 6 feet tall has its advantages. Great job and good luck! Your girls are adorable.

kristi brooke said...

Congrats!

Melissa said...

How fun for you to have another girl- congratulations! I just had my 4th girl in May. She is such a joy. I love girls!
(I'm Kristen and Carolee's sister and new to blogging)

kacey@doodlebugspaper.com said...

WHOOO HOOOO!! Congratulations!! I am so excited for you! What fabulous news for you and your family!!

Carolee said...

I was worried at first. I havent been on anyones blog for a few days and my sister emailed me and all it said was "read angies blog" and then I went on and your heading scared me. So glad it is good news!!! By the way no wonder noone could tell you were expecting, I dont see a baby bump yet!! Lucky:)

michelle said...

WOW! I cannot imagine keeping that secret for so long -- I don't know how you did it! How fun though to already be halfway there. Sorry to hear about the complications. I hope the second 20 weeks are smooth sailing.

Jennifer said...

Hi. I'm a friend of Carolee's. I just started a blog yesterday, so I'm trying to figure out how this all works & get ideas. I really like the layout of your blog and how you have links to those special lists and challenges. I'll have to make those lists FIRST, then I'll want to figure out how to put them along the side. Very cool.

I actually was drawn in by your "condition" story. I'm due about the same time as you. About a week behind. YOU look fabulous. I could NEVER hide it. I get WAY too sick and don't show up for anything and I'm NOT good at coming up with a big enough cover story.

You are way cute to give the creative announcement. My family and friends usually find out by asking, "you haven't been well for a while. Are you pregnant?" It's the direct questions that are hard to dodge.

Anyway. Congrats!

Laurie said...

20 weeks is an incredible amount of time to hold such a big secret. I'm impressed. Your big reveal to the grandmas sounds really cute. I love the idea of having four girls. How neat!!

pam said...

I got goose bumps reading your post and even a little teary, I'm such a boob! It took all the self control I possess to not jump to the bottom. I'm so happy for you and your family and you look gorgeous!

Allison said...

Congratulations! i can't believe Jenny didn't spill the beans to me.

You look fabulous! i look more pregnant than you. What a wonderful thing.

Janice said...

I discovered you through Tiffany's blog and like you, I never tell anyone I am pregnant until I am about 18 weeks or until it is too obvious that I am showing. Congratulations.

sista # 2 said...

Just one more congratulations! yay.

Barb said...

Congratulations! You look fantastic.

Karli said...

holy cow you have so many comments you may never get to this one! Congratulations! That is a fun surprise. Can't believe you kept it that long. I am pregnant with my first and just passed the 21 week mark. I told people at 6 weeks because I was so excited...and so sick! I couldn't hide it after missing three weeks of church. It was miserable..but now it's much better. You look amazing! Especially for it being your fourth child! Good for you! I have been doing the elliptical every morning and trying to eat good and I lost 12 at first, so I've only gained maybe a pound back from my pre preg weight, but I still feel bloated. (: I just posted my 21 week pics at my blog: our84days.blogspot.com

Good luck with the rest and any advice you have on mothering would be great! (:

Karli

Mandy said...

Congratulations! I'm so happy for you!

lelly said...

well, i guess this post makes up for only 14 this summer!

congratulations!

Jill said...

Wow, what a story! I can't believe you were able to keep this a secret (even from your family) for so long. I also can't believe that you look that tiny even at 20 weeks!

Congratulations!

Kelly A. said...

Congratulations again! But really I came to say how did your family fare through Humberto?

The Isom Eight said...

I'm a lurker-but congratulations! My family has 5 girls and I love sisters! I hope all goes terrifically!

Janelle :-)

Shawna B. said...

Hi Angie! Many congratulations! I have three sisters and we are such good friends. Your girls are so lucky to have each other - adding another to the mix just gives them another friend (o.k., and probably another gal to fight with at times, but we aren't thinking about that right now!). Best wishes to you!

Amberly said...

Angie, I'm so glad I popped by for a catch-up visit to your blog tonight- I can see you've had plenty of visitors lately, but I just wanted to add my congratulations and hope that everything goes very smoothly for you. I look forward to reading the updates as your pregnancy progresses.

Dana said...

Congrats Angie! SO exciting :)